It begins with “Men are different. Our more active lifestyles give our scalp a beating…”
Your lifestyle is more active than whose, exactly? Are you talking about non-athletes in general? Then you should have said “Athletes are different.” Then you would just come across as arrogant pr*cks in excluding the rest of us who aren’t blessed with athletic prowess. But at least, not sexist.
Or are you talking about non-footballers? Then the script should have just said “Football players are different.” Now that would have been offensive on a whole other level.
So what exactly do you want to say here, Clear? Could you be talking about – gasp! – women? That men have more active lifestyles than women? Because there are no women footballers? Because there are no female athletes? Nooo… No one could be that stupid, right?
If you’re pushing a product for men, wouldn’t it have been better to say something like “Men’s scalps are different”? Yes, it’s not the most elegant of sentences, but that’s your job, copywriters. The message should be clear (oh look! is that a pun?) and not offensive in any way.
I swear, every time I see this commercial I want to hurl something at those Younghusbands. SERIOUSLY.
Way to effing go, Clear. Good job.